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Backwards N High Heels

Balancing work and play while wearing many hats (I mean heels).

The Perfect Diaper Bag

July 18, 2016

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It is all in the bag, the diaper bag that is!

Mommy’s, Daddy’s, lend me your ear. If I can tell you one piece of advice regarding parenting and baby equipment needs, put some major thought into your diaper bag of choice.

Your diaper bag is your constant steady as you negotiate through the trials and tribulations of parenthood. It is the steadfast friend. There through meltdowns at the restaurant, there for major blowouts on the road, there on your shoulder when you breakdown and cry because you just can’t take it any more and there to hold every flipping thing a little human could possibly need. So, give it thought and shop wisely.

Lo is already a year and a half and my diaper bag has been through it all and still standing. Dirty, but still standing.

How to choose the perfect diaper bag?

  1. Functionality
    Functionality is HUGE! You need a bag that has a large amount of compartments or pockets. Currently, I am carrying around: two swimsuits (because why only 1, right?), a swimsuit cover-up, 4 disposable swim diapers, boogie spray, two types of sunscreen (spray and lotion), face sunscreen, Tylenol, sweatshirt, 2 bibs, 3 outfits, a pacifier, a burp cloth (now just an extra wipe up rag), Clorox wipes, bottle or sippy cup, a book, a small stuffed animal and a changing table insert (which holds diapers, wipes and trash bags). You see that is a lot of stuff! So, without great compartments for organizing I would be one hot baby momma mess. Make sure those pockets are inside the bag too! That is the perfect place to through keys, money or your ID. I promise you, your diaper bag will become your purse for some time, so just accept it and move on.
  2. Room To Grow
    Maybe one day there will be two children in our home, so that diaper bag will need to hold double the stuff! Have you ever seen a parent with a diaper bag per child? Please don’t say yes. Of course, not. You have one bag per fleet of children, so make sure your diaper bag can grow with you.
  3. Fabric
    There are so many options out there when it comes to diaper bags. There are coated canvas which creates waterproof barriers, Teflon coated nylon which is stain-proof and washable, cotton fabric which is lightweight and leather which is durable and beautiful. These are just a few. There are multiple fabric options out there. The point is each provides pros and cons that need considered when purchasing.
  4. Comfort
    Shopping for a diaper bag is just as important as shopping for new shoes. This is an item you will be wearing daily, so go with something that is not too bulky. Something that won’t make you cringe every time you go out. The straps on a bag are super important too. Make sure there is support or extra padding. As you weight down your bag with items, it can wreck havoc on your shoulders and back. Be considerate of the purpose of the diaper bag to begin with and if you can, I suggest wearing it around the store while you shop, before you commit.
  5. Style
    Again, your diaper bag, will replace your purse, so my advise is to pick out something that reflects you and your style. Something you want to own and wear. While I love Disney movies, I would not want a Disney character purse, so why would I want a Disney character diaper bag? Pick a bag that you want to wear. This is definitely one of those baby gear items that you should selfishly find that works for you versus your child. They will not care what your bag looks like. I can promise you that!

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One – 200.00  |  Two – 90.99  |  Three – 99.99  |  Four – 44.99  |  Five – 95.00

And, don’t worry, Daddy’s, there are some great bags out there for you too! In fact, they even have a name, Diaper Dudes. Here are three I would recommend.

Option One
Option Two
Option Three

Whichever bag you choose, make sure you love it! This is something that you will use daily, I repeat, daily, and will be an important part of your wardrobe and travels.

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You Are Bigger Than This Big World

July 3, 2016

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I look around my yard, our little slice of mountain heaven. We live in a beautiful part of the country. Rolling hills, deep thick woods and views that we too often take for granted. I can jump in my car and be at one State Park in 15 minutes, or start from the opposite direction and be at another in 10. Actually, I could physically walk to the latter and tried once, but mentally freaked myself out over a bear and forced my husband to turn around and lead us home. And, you truly are a child of nature. Maybe you see the beauty more than I. Years of living in this same place, I rarely take it in anymore. Plus, my sights are on you. Watching your every move as you explore the only bit of the world you have ever really seen. It is quite coincidentally that you don’t yet know what is out there for you to explore, yet I tune it all out because all I see is you.

You are bigger than this big world.

I have turned down opportunities. I have set my sights on reality. I know our limits as a family. “Let’s take off and go to Key West for your 30th birthday,” a group of us discussed over drinks late one night. The phone has rang, and I have been approached with great opportunities in Florida and Texas. For a split second, my mind wonders. Sometimes, I think about what could be. But, then I look at you with your toys across the living room floor, and I think of our family who surrounds us and provides safety and you relationships, and I could never imagine anything more. Every decision this world presents, you are the deciding factor.

You are bigger than this big world.

Voices in my head. All of our heads. Society quick to judge us as parents. Your child must be in bed by 8 pm. The binkie and bottle should have been gone, like three months ago. Basically, I am sure your teeth are going to fall out. She is not climbing stairs without help yet? Gasp! Wait! Did you say bottle, does that mean you are still not breastfeeding? Does she come into your bed at night? You really need to engage in the crying it out method. It comes from your mom, your best friend, the media, social media friends, parenting magazine, this here Blog! Voices swirl around me as a parent – do this, not that, eat this, not that. The leading Pediatrician says this but the world’s leading psychologist says that. You know what? What do you need, honey? Tell, me! It has not always been easy. Especially, since you are my first, but I am so much better at this. Shutting the voices and opinions down and not worrying about how you compare to another child down the street or how you compare to children your age as a national average.

You are bigger than this big world.

When my work day has been long, mentally exhausting, when I worry about small details that at the end of the day drive no true results or get me anywhere. When I care to much about satisfying others than for standing up for what I believe. Suffocating my own voice. When I feel anxiety creep into my chest and sometimes my heart beats so big I feel like it could explode. I think of you. I grab my cell phone, I flip through your pictures. Does my heart still hurt? Yes, because now I miss you as I sit here at my desk. But, slowly my anxiety becomes controllable, and I think to myself, “This is what matters.” And, I gain a part of myself back.

You are bigger than this big world.

In a world where there is violence, hate, racism, misunderstanding and pure evil, I watch in horror, flipping through news stations hoping one will reveal answers over another. I have come to feel so much pain and reveal my own anger. How does this exist? Where have we (yes, we) gone wrong? Sometimes I think, “If the world is this bad now, how bad will it be for you when you are an adult?” What will be your big world?

You are bigger than this big world.

Don’t you ever forget that! When life is hard. When the cards are not dealt in your favor. On days or nights when you want to run home and crash into your bed crying. When you feel like giving up.  When things feel overwhelming, unfair, unpleasant and unimaginable. Remember – You are bigger than this big world.

My hope as your mother is that this same outlook I have on you, my everything, you have for yourself, but so much bigger. That you realize that you can do anything, go anywhere, be anything and change things. While this big ol’ world can be scary. The unknown exists and is everywhere. You little lady are already, far bigger.

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The Roots Of Our Family, My Mom

June 24, 2016

Today, my beautiful Momma turns a milestone age.

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I won’t announce her year of birth or the numbers of candles on the cake. As a woman I know, that is reserved for her discretion. But, I will share that it is in fact a celebration year.

I cannot adequately express the love and admiration I have for this beautiful soul. She is the heartbeat of our family. Strong and unbreakable.

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As I got thinking about her more deeply, my mind kept flashing pictures to me of the roots of a tree. And, I thought, “Wow, what a symbol for her?”

You see, roots typically lie below the surface of the earth’s soil. My mother has always been in the background. She was the stay-at-home-mom, who managed five children, each with unique personalities and passions. She had gone to college to become a nurse and put that on the back burner for her children. As a child, I never noticed occupations, but as I entered middle school and became more observant of my friends and their family dynamics, I often wondered. At times, I remember not being proud when someone would ask, “What does your mom do for a living?”

“She stays at home,” I would mumble without making eye contact. Why did I think it was so bad? In fact, it was great! She was always present. She juggled us, our schedules, our wants and needs, the home, our meals, the laundry and much more. But, just like wine gets better with age, so does knowledge and understanding. I soon absorbed the weight of her sacrifice and once I had a child, truly understood the work, my golly the work of a stay-at-home-mom. It is a thankless, demanding, 24-7, no vacation days job. One no career seeker would ever want to take on. But, it was rewarding for us kids. She was the steady one, often unnoticed and underappreciated for her contributions and their value.

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And, severing roots, can damage a tree. When she was down, we all were down. You know the saying “Happy wife, happy life.” It goes for Mom too! If our Mom hurt we felt it. To this day, any pain or sadness she endures seems to magnify my own feelings. It is like we are virtually connected and what her soul feels, I too can feel.

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Roots take up water, minerals and nutrients from the soil to help the tree grow. When I read this, I smile, because that is the epitome of my Mom. The most selfless human I know. Sacrificing for the sake of others. Piling on her plate and adding another line to her to-do list. Not motivated by money or things for such added responsibility but for the mere sake of giving. Soaking up every bit of herself, her energy and her love, to throw back out to us to have and experience and to rely upon. Her kindness and care for her mother, my grandmother, who has become dependent on her through the years, to willingly and excitedly taking on childcare of my daughter, so that I can work outside the home. These are just a few examples of the magnitude of her love and heart.

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Then the strongest of all, roots provide an anchor to the plant. And, that is what she is. Our anchor. A constant reminder of safe, home and love. The best wide open arms you would ever need to come running, crashing into. The best contemplation of words you need to hear. To make you a better person or comfort your breaking heart. The soft shoulder to cry onto or lean upon when the world gets brutal and tough. The steadfast root system that breathes the life into our family.

She is deeply rooted to us and we to her.

Thank you, Mom for all that you have sacrificed, for the strong support you provide and for the life you have made for us. Happy Birthday!

5 Comments CATEGORIES // Family TAGGED: Backwards In High Heels, Backwards N High Heels, Backwards N High Heels Lifestyle Blog, BackwardsNHighHeels, Happy Birthday, Mom Advice, Mom Life, Motherhood, Parenting, Roots

1.5 Staring At Me

June 20, 2016

There you are, my sweet baby girl.
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Those big blues, get me every time. How has time flown? How are you running and chasing and climbing and talking? I always heard other parents exclaim, “Cherish every moment. Time will fly by.”

I never believed them. How could it be? A month sometimes felt like forever, and a year an eternity. But, now that I have you I see, understand and feel time. The tick tock that echos in my mind.

You have a personality. Ornery at its best. You make us laugh and smile. You keep us on our toes with your energetic ways. Never too tired. Never content with the same thing, but always, always on the go. Up and down and literally all around. Yesterday, you mimicked my ways and hid on the opposite of the bed waiting to “roar” as I walked by. Sometimes you leave me quite awe-struck at your little brain and the way you pick things up.

You are smart. Counting to 10 on cue and proudly announcing the color “Blue!” when detected. Surpassing “Where are your eyes? Noes? Ears?” and now identifying your shoulders and elbows! You absorb at the highest.

Your temper tantrums intensify. And, patience not yet your virtue. But, maybe not mine yet either, so you get it honestly. Sorry.

Your smile. Those crazy “big kid” teeth that seem to sprout like a well watered bloom and that crazy giggle gets your Daddy and I every time.

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All decked in your Sunday best, you just want “down!” to run, to explore, to see the world and take it in. I have made a mental pact with myself to never buy you white anymore. It just gets ruined. You live in the moment like all kids do. Spotting a fluttering butterfly and chasing. Hearing a crackling in the woods and looking up at me before taking off to the tree line. It is refreshing and lovely.

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The true ‘apple of our eye.’ You are loved more than you know and can easily comprehend. For you are the reason I smile every day. You are the reason I am proud of me.

1.5 years old and staring me in the face. My goodness, what a sweet wonderful world  you are.

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What Is The Best Advice Your Dad Has Given To You

June 19, 2016

“My father gave me the greatest gift anyone could give another person, he believed in me.” – Jim Valvano

During Mother’s Day, I reached out to a handful of friends and asked them to contribute to my Blog. You can read that Here. The whole process was so enlightening and inspiring that I decided to do the same for Dads, but switch it up a bit.

On Friday, I shared This Post. It was a tribute to my own father. A man that I do not thank or appreciate enough. This morning I awoke, kissed my husband and told him “Happy Father’s Day,” opened Facebook and found out that one of my friends lost her husband last night. He a father, a great father, I witnessed him in action. My heart broke and the sudden heaviness on my chest seemed much more overwhelming as I sat and thought about his children who would awaken this morning without the earthly presence of their Dad. While I pray for them today and send positive thoughts out to the universe, I know so many of you too will read this Blog as a “fatherless child.”

I do not know your pain. I do not know the emptiness you feel. Whether it be a sudden loss, a father who has passed for many years, a father who is alive but you are estranged from, know that today while you pass the greeting card aisle, see a family out at breakfast, open Facebook to a flood of messages and pictures, know that I am thinking of you.

Those who are blessed to still have their Dad with them today, please call him, visit him or send him a text. Say “I love you,” say “I appreciate you” and please say “thank you.”

As a mother, I know the sacrifices and love I make for my child. Watching my husband with her, well the love and sacrifices he makes for our family is equally as tremendous. And, also as a parent, I finally feel like a fog is lifted from my eyes and I see just how much my parents have given through the years and how incredibly their love has been.

So today, Happy Father’s Day Friends and to my Blog contributors – Thank you.


I asked each friend below to answer the following:

“What is the best advice your Dad has given to you?”

The answers, well, you just have to read!


Fathers-Day_BackwardsNHighHeels_Blog 4“When asked ‘What is the best advice your Dad has ever given you?’ I really didn’t know what to say. I couldn’t think of a time when my dad sat me down and said, ‘Here is some advice to live by.’ The more I thought about it, the more I realized that my dad has given me a lifetime of advice without saying a word. The whole, “actions speak louder than words” rings true. In my life, my dad has advised me to work hard for every single penny you have, that those same pennies mean nothing at the end of the day, to make good on your promises even when jumping ship feels like the easy way out, to be true to yourself and never apologize for that, to admit it when you are wrong, to always say you’re sorry, to never settle for ‘good enough,’ to always help those in need, and to laugh like heck every step of the journey. My Daddy has never had to give me any advice, I’ve always been blessed to watch his actions and simply know, this is how you live.” – Mallory


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“My Dad gave advice by example. He would tell me to be kind, sensitive to others, generous and do what’s right. Of course, that’s how he lives his life. The best advice he gave my brother, ‘I don’t care if you want to dig ditches the rest of your life. Just be the best ditch digger you can be.’ And, I have to share two from my husband’s Dad, ‘Don’t ever get a financial advisor. If they know so much about money, they’d be retired.’ And, my favorite, on the occasion of our first date, ‘Just remember, pick your nose with your right hand and scratch your butt with your left.’ That man was a character.’ – Michaela



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“My Dad and I are cut from the same cloth. The older I get, the more similarities I find. As you can see from the picture and our incredible sense of style, lol. My Dad is the most inspirational man on the planet. He dreams big, fights for what he believes in and never gives up. All while maintaining a big belly laugh that makes you feel at home every time you hear it. I call him the “Big Fish” because he reminds me so much of Dad from the movie, “The Big Fish.” The best advice he ever gave me, and there have been some gems, is that ‘Failure is not an option.’ Anytime I was afraid of making a leap of faith in life, love, or business he would just tell me to believe and that if I believe, I can’t fail, then anything is possible. He is 100% right. Anytime the “what if” worry trolls start to creep in I just repeat that phrase and know that I can overcome and find success. I love this man more everyday and feel honored to call him my Father, my mentor, and one of my best friends.” – Coty



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“Okay, it was hard to choose what the best advice has been since all of his advice has helped to shape who I am but I’ll go with this. My Papa many times has said, ‘Live your life honestly, be true to those you love and always follow what it is that makes you who you are. (…and clean your room!).’ Ha! He’s our favorite storyteller, a forever friend, and our hero!” – Deanna



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Look out there…
“My father was a large man.  My mother referred to him as a ‘gentle giant.’ His large posture and huge hands had many young suitors of his daughter’s shaking in their shoes. I was the youngest of his five children and due to the large age gap from my closest sibling, quite possibly an “Oops!”  I was; however, definitely daddy’s little girl. I remember my dad taking me kicking and screaming in his big, strong arms and walking me calmly into the Atlantic Ocean. He finally stopped waist deep and told me to stop crying and ‘look out there.’ I did and it was amazing. A few years later he took me on a Ferris Wheel. Once again, I was screaming because we were stuck at the top.  He giggled softly and told me to take my hands away from my face and ‘look out there.’  I did and it was awesome. Fast forward to my teens and my father was teaching me to drive.  Half way through the stressful lesson when all I did was stare at the road, he placed his hand on my shoulder and told me to ‘look out there.’ I did and it was easier. I didn’t realize it at the time but my father didn’t want me to live my life with my head down.  He didn’t want me to be too scared, too serious or too focused. He wanted me to stop worrying and enjoy the people, places and experiences around me no matter how big or small. I still struggle to follow his advice in my busy life. I do find that I have missed a lot because I didn’t ‘look out there.’ But I will be forever grateful that he told me to ‘look out there’ and I hope I can pass this advice on to my children.” – Joy


“My Dad was an amazing, amazing man. I know many people will say this today, especially since its Father’s Day and I’m sure they mean it also, but anyone who knew my Dad will tell you this is absolutely true. I don’t know of one person that did not like him nor do I know of anyone that he disliked. I never heard him speak a harsh word about anyone. In my entire life I never saw him mad or angry. I don’t know of any other person I can say that about. He was so kind and compassionate. He chose to talk about the good in people. He had patience beyond words. He was never to busy for you. He gave you his undivided attention. I’ll tell you a little story about this. My Dad use to work on his vehicles in his garage. A little neighborhood boy whose father had died would come down to his house and for hours would lay on the ground with my Dad under his car asking questions. ‘What’s this? What’s that? What does this do? What does that do?’ On, and on. My Dad explained everything in great detail to him. My Mom would say to my Dad, ‘How can you stand that day after day? All those same questions?’ My Dad would reply, ‘It’s ok, Honey, he just needs someone to talk to. He’s just lonely.’ My Dad was a very funny guy also. He loved to play jokes on people. He loved to scare the living day lights out of you. I can still hear his laugh. He was a huge Washington Redskins fan. He loved picnics, amusement parks and especially riding the roller coasters. He loved going camping with his kids and grandkids. Sometimes spending the entire summer at the river with his family. Christmas was his favorite holiday. He was like a sorcerer working his magic. When we were kids the tree was never brought into the house until we were all in bed on Christmas Eve. By morning it looked like a mystical, magical farmland. The tree decorated from top to bottom and a Christmas yard under the tree that was so detailed it looked like a live village. There were houses, churches, stores and roads made from coal dust. A train that ran on a track (THIS ONE IS FOR YOU, ASHLI) a mirror for a pond. Still to this day, I don’t know how he got it all done in one night. He was a Veteran. He served in the Army during World War II. He was loyal. He kept the same friends he served in the war with his entire life. He was a honest, hard working man that never missed a day of work. He was a Christian and he put God and his family above everything. His parenting skills surpass all others. He taught us to love unconditionally and we learned this by following his example. Oh! By the way, he always smelled so good! I still have a bottle of his after shave lotion. Sometimes I open it up and just breath the scent of him in and at that moment I know he’s right here beside me. The one thing he taught me, and I learned this by his example, was to love unconditionally. I hope I have passed this down to my kids and grandkids. There is a song that says, “I’d like to teach the world to sing in perfect harmony.” If this was my Dad’s song, it would say “I’d like to teach the world to love in perfect harmony.” HAPPY FATHERS DAY DADDY! Love you!” – Pat (my Meema)
How beautiful? Again, thank you to my special Blog contributors. Much love to you! And, to you all, no matter where your heart feels today, I send you virtual hugs and love.

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How The World’s Quietest Man, Taught Me The World’s Loudest Lessons

June 17, 2016

Father’s Day weekend is here and I thought it would be fitting to carve out some time and some space on the internet to honor my Dad. Although, it is kind of funny though, as my Dad really deep down despises the internet and social media because he can’t stand walking into a room and seeing his family, with their ‘noses all in their phones and faces down.’ As a marketing professional with a strong grasp on all things social media and digitally related, he still to this day, eight years into my career, cannot fully understand what I do or how it impacts business.

I have had countless conversations on what Twitter is versus Facebook and the definition of a ‘Tweet’ and how it all works. He knows I have this Blog but cannot fully grasp what a ‘Blog’ is or why I would ever spend my free time doing this. He has questioned why we (as in his family) are so obsessed with our phones, and then when I say, ‘This is the way the world now communicates with each other and businesses.” He scowls and explains, “Well, I don’t.”

Happy Birthday Dad

It is ultimately funny that I sit here writing about communication when my father is a man of very little words. Let me repeat for you, very little words.

Growing up we knew no different, but I would be remiss if I didn’t share how I realized in elementary school just how little he spoke, when I would have sleepovers at friends’ houses. One girlfriend had a Dad who was always the life of our get-together. You knew it was her birthday party each year, as he would march through the house starting a Kongo line and yelling for us each to join in. Another friend’s Dad was such an integral part of her life, that he was the one we called in High School to pick us up outside dances and parties, and when we pilled in the car he would entertain and crack us up the whole way home.

My father was different.

Happy Birthday Dad

We picked on him, and still do for his lack of words. With that said, I never questioned his love for me or involvement, because he showed his emotions through other means. When I would want to sit for hours with my Mom rehashing every detail of a major accomplishment, all I needed from Dad, was eye contact and a quick ‘proud of you’ and I was content. He attended every major high school football, soccer and basketball game… to watch me cheer on the sidelines. He made me learn to drive a stick shift and as I whined and pouted, “I cannot do this.” He gritted his teeth and yelled back, “Yes, you can.” Then on my 17th birthday, he woke me up extra early and said, ‘Let’s practice driving a manual again.” Only to lead me, from the passenger seat, to a local car dealership to test drive an automatic. Then as we pulled back in the dealership, he simply stated “Happy Birthday, Ashli.”

When I graduated from High School, I rushed around like an idiot trying to get ready for the big night so I could go meet my friends for a pre-ceremony celebration. As he tried to stop me multiple times in our home, I was too selfish to give the man who said so little any time of day. Then he slipped a piece of paper in my hand, and as I waited for my friends in a grocery store parking lot I cried like a baby at the hand written note he had given me, praising me and expressing his love.

My Dad had placed emphasis on me to be an architect, something to this day, I still regret not doing. Buying into his urging, we agreed I would attend the local college for one year and then transfer to the state university for Architectural school. When I fell in love with theater my freshman year of college, I unveiled my new plans to my Dad, on the stage of a state Beauty Pageant competition. As he sat in the crowd watching me, with a big button of my face, attached to his shirt, the announcer read the pre-submitted cue cards, in which mine stated, “A theatre major.” Shortly, after defeat and facing my father in the hotel hallway, he hugged me, kissed my forward, told me I should have won and quietly said, “theatre, huh?”

Then, when I fell in love and soon my wedding day starred us both in the face, he stayed in the background for pre-planning. Shining as the unsung hero who somehow was able to arrange a seating chart to accompany 175 people in a tiny red barn. As we lined up for the procession, and the violinist played softly in the background, I knew he sensed that I felt a bit faint and suddenly incoherent. I remember distinctly my father saying to the nearest bridesmaid, “Get her a glass of wine.” As, the bridal party walked out of the house and through the field to our wedding guests, we stayed back a moment longer. I sipped the wine and starred my father in the eyes. Little words. But a private moment I will always cherish.

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I remember not to long ago someone said, “Your Dad does not speak much, but when he does, we all listen.”

I agreed, but while I always listened, I didn’t always appreciate. For that, I am sorry, Dad. But as I near 30 years old in August (Yikes!), I finally, finally do. My Dad has taught me the following about life.

  1. America was built by hard working individuals, who made a lot of sacrifices in life for the betterment of others. Respect that and them, and more importantly honor that, by in turn giving your all every single day, always working hard.
  2. Save your money! Gosh, I remember thinking I hated him for this. After ever birthday party, “Ebenezer Scrooge” would make a grand appearance, with a palm open. I would have to hand over any money I received as a gift and he would count it in front of me. Then promptly hand me back half. He would explain that the other half would go into my savings account he opened and would in turn be mine when I turned 18 years old. I remember crying. Screaming, “These are birthday gifts. You want the half of my Barbie too!” He really never argued back, more just walked away, but not without hearing me scream, “This is not fair!” (By the way, he kept his word, and at 18 years old, I received access to my account.) I miraculous, loved my father again!
  3. Speaking of fair. He taught me just that… life is not and will never be fair. Learn it and accept it.
  4. Sacrifice. With five kids, I sometimes to this day get mad at him for working so hard and sacrificing so much, and feel saddened that he truly doesn’t live. But, I am starting to believe that to him living means watching his five kids enjoy life and be happy.
  5. Contribute to a 401k. Even if you make little to nothing and you think you need every dollar. Put something away for retirement.
  6. That the best things in life are sweets! You can totally eat 12 cookies, a large piece of cake and a slice of pie in one seating! He does it all the time.
  7. You can always get by in life with far less than you currently have.
  8. You always, always have a choice in life. This was a recent, new, tough lesson from him. As tears rolled down my face over some tough decisions, he coldly told me, “You are not allowed to cry in front of me over this.” You are in control here. You have a choice.
  9. Sometimes it is best to remain quiet. 🙂 That not everything needs your opinion.
  10. And, finally his favorite line – “Accept what you can not change, change what you can not accept, and have the wisdom to know the difference.”

Powerful lessons from the man who would nod his head at the game scoring touchdown, vs leap off his stadium seat screaming. A man who bites his nail and mumbles a chuckle, while the rest of a room erupts in laughter over comic relief. A man who subtly tells you, “Drop the p,” when you hand him a card with “Grandpap” written on the front, to announce how he wants his first grandchild to address him.

How The World's Quietest Man, Taught Me The World's Loudest Lessons 4

You, see I grew up through this life with a man who spoke few words… but generated loud messages, loud lessons. It wasn’t until I became an adult and maybe even a parent that the weight of his quiet presence, all through my life, has been felt.

Thank you, Dad. Thank you for big lessons, tough love and your steady presence through my life. And, Happy Father’s Day!

1 Comment CATEGORIES // Family TAGGED: Backwards In High Heels, Backwards N High Heels, Backwards N High Heels Lifestyle Blog, BackwardsNHighHeels, Dad, Father, Father's Day, How The World's Quietest Man, Life Lessons, Motherhood, Parenting, Taught Me The World's Loudest Lessons, Tough Lessons

We Change Things

June 13, 2016

BackwardsNHighHeelsWhen I started this Blog I promised myself one thing, ‘not to use my Blog as a platform for news or political viewpoints.’ My intention was to keep this space lighthearted, happy and fun. But, then I realized that is not such of life and while this Blog is deeply rooted in motherhood and parenting, it too is about living in general. At the end of the day, I would describe my content as a celebration of motherhood and ultimately a space that inspires just that as well.

So, while this may not seem or feel like the right place, I felt a nagging to let my emotions ride the waves of my words.

Living is what this Blog is about. Therefore, when life is taken and so horrifically and even so massively, we feel raw and hurt and helpless and a slew of other emotions.

As the tragic news out of Orlando presented itself yesterday morning and as more and more details were shared and released I began to feel quite numb, and then this morning, I finally cried. My heart broke as I washed my hands in the bathroom. I looked into the mirror saw my reflection and felt hopeless, enraged and distraught. How does Hate exist at this level? I looked at myself and thought, ‘What can I do?’

49 people are dead and 50+ injured. Lives taken from this world over one person’s beliefs. The city of Orlando is shaken and heartbroken. And, the LGBT community is mourning not only the loss of many lives but an attack on their rights and freedoms in this world.
BackwardsNHighHeels 3
Regardless of what you believe, can we stop judging people and start seeing people? That is it, my goodness, so simple –  just start seeing people. Other human beings who have a brain, a beating heart and a soul. Other human beings who are a sister, brother, father, mother, someone’s child and someone’s best friend. I believe that it is not my place on this Earth to judge and it is not part of my job description as a human in this world, to do so either. And, when I do make a natural decision to like or not like another human being, at the end of the day it does not come down to sex, age, race, religion or sexual orientation but their character. For that I am proud and I challenge us all to begin operating in such a way.

So, what can I do?

Well, I can love. I can be kind. I can spread words of encouragement and hope. I can reach out. I can be supportive. And, I can pray.

“I used to believe the prayer changes things, but now I know that prayer changes us, and we change things.” Mother Teresa

We change things. We change things. We change things. Remember that. We change things.

My heart and prayers are with you.

2 Comments CATEGORIES // Family TAGGED: Backwards In High Heels, Backwards N High Heels, Backwards N High Heels Lifestyle Blog, BackwardsNHighHeels, We Change Things

Summertime Parenting Hacks

June 3, 2016

So, it rained about 22 of the last 30 days, but then Mother Nature was all like “Hey, hey Summertime, I am feeling ya,” and blessed us with some very warm, hot days.

No, I am not complaining! I promise. I have been longing for sunshine and warmth and sunshine oh, and warmth. You catch my drift?

But, let me let you in on a little secret… hot summer days with a toddler. Yep not the same, as pre-baby. I NEVER sit anymore. I chase. That is my new mode. I am in chasing mode. I also have sunscreen on my hip for the first sign of redness. My beers actually turn warm before I can finish, because I place them down to again, chase a toddler and then I forget where I put them. I get nervous about bare feet on wooden decks – splinters. Bare feet in lawns – bees. Bare feet in gravel – unidentifiable sharp objects. Basically I am a scaredy cat!

So, when I stumble across life hacks for parenting, I am all like, “Hallelujah! Can I get hellz yeah, Momma?!” And, then I high five myself. Let me indulge you.

1 – Toys On The Go
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Recycle and reuse your empty wipe containers as to-go, toy canisters for outdoor and on the go summer fun. Who cares if they get filled with sand, dropped in mud, dropped in a puddle. You can easily clean off and reuse.

2 – Mess-free PopsiclesSummertime-Hacks-For-Kids_Mess-Free-Popsicles_BackwardsNHighHeelsSource
I find myself shivering at the thought of sticky, sugary juice melting in the hot summer sun, all over little hands. Yuck! Especially when you are outdoors and not near a public restroom. Double yuck! Pack cupcake tins during your next picnic. It will surely intrigue the kids and protect them and you from a sticky mess.

3 – Bug Free Drinks
Summertime-Hacks-For-Kids_Bug-Free-Drinks_BackwardsNHighHeelsSource
Yep, cupcake tins in for the win again. (Totally did not mean to rhyme there). Anyways, cover sugary, sweet drinks with a cupcake tin to protect bees and insects that stake their claim in your summertime beverage.

4 – Protect Your Phone
Summertime-Hacks-For-Kids_Phone-Protector_BackwardsNHighHeels

Always, always pack a zip lock baggie if the following equation is taking place. You + child + water = Disaster! I tend to throw my cell which also has a lifeproof case, in a zip lock baggie too. Maybe I am crazy? Overly cautious? Or all subconscious.

5 – Cool Off
Summertime-Hacks-For-Kids_Cool-Off_BackwardsNHighHeels
Source
How cool is this? I am totally down for this during the hot summer months. Cut some sponges into cubes, string together and soak in cold water. Then when your little is hot, place around their neck, to naturally cool them off. If they are a baby or toddler, they may chew on the sponges which will help with their gums and cool them down.

6 – One-Stop-Shop Bag
Summertime-Hacks-For-Kids_Cool-Off_BackwardsNHighHeels 4Source
A one-stop-shop bag is a must! Band aids, Tide-to-Go and medicine, can each have their moment to shine this summer. So, let this bag do its job. Only, thing missing? Mommy’s tequila. Just kidding. Maybe?

7 – Mess Free Bubbles
Summertime-Hacks-For-Kids_Mess-Free-Bubbles_BackwardsNHighHeels
I found this picture on Pinterest with no link. Boo! I even tried Google image search and it just showed Pinterest shares, but again no link. How smart is this? I mean I cringe at the thought of handing over the wand and tube to my bubble loving baby. She just lacks… grace, let’s say.

8 – Bug Free Sandbox
Summertime-Hacks-For-Kids_Bug-Free-Sandbox_BackwardsNHighHeelsSource
So, I have no clue if this works, but you bet I am going to try it! Apparently, cinnamon keeps the bugs away, so once you sprinkle throughout the sandbox and stir, goodbye bugs, hello sweet smelling sand, oh, no – do not eat that, child!

9 – Keep the Baby Pool Clean
Summertime-Hacks-For-Kids_Keeping-The-Pool-Clean_BackwardsNHighHeelsSource
Yeah, okay, so I needed this hack a week ago. We have filled and refilled the baby pool twice now. And, rain and pollen have dirtied the pool, yet again. Cover your baby pool with a fitted sheet to keep the water clean. There, done.

10 – Sand RemovalSummertime-Hacks-For-Kids_Sand-Removal_BackwardsNHighHeels
So apparently Baby Powder and sand, well they do not mix! This easy summertime hack is so simple! Just rub some powder between your hands and then rub across skin. Goodbye sand.

So, there you have it. Some summertime parenting hacks. Do you have some secrets to add to the list? If so, share in the comment section below.

Enjoyed this post?  Awe, thanks. I am blushing.  We can connect through facebook || twitter|| instagram || pinterest ||  bloglovin’

 

 

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Wishes For My Little Girl

May 14, 2016

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Oh, the many, many faces of my sweet, ornery little girl.

I am becoming more and more aware of the fact that my daughter is growing so very quickly, right before my eyes.  Her personality is becoming defined. Temper tantrums are for real a thing that 100% exists. (Oh, and they do not wait until the clock strikes midnight and she turns from 1 to 2.) She is running, full fledged, running. She is nurturing and loves babies (no ideas, people). She is cognitive of her surroundings and picks up on verbiage and communication cues. She is growing. Out of clothes and shoes and cute PJ’s. Sometimes, Nathan will say, “Look at her. She looks like a ‘big’ kid now.” She is a Daddy’s girl 80% of the time and a Mommy’s in the mornings and late at night. She is hard headed and strong willed. I am in trouble. Her daddy is in trouble.

Most days I don’t allow my mind to trickle away to get ‘too deep.’ But, as we were cooped up inside for almost two fulls days due to rain and the return of cold air, my thoughts did wander. I look as this little lady who just seems to have a personality that is bursting at the seams and I can’t imagine who and what she will be.

And the truth is none of us know. I can only hope that the beauty of her blooms stronger and wilder as she grows (minus the whole temper tantrums) and that through example and faith, she is generous, happy and kind. I pray every night as I hold her tight, “Lord, let her be a happy, kind soul.” I pray that she always has a strong connection and relationship with Nathan and I. That she trusts us and that she lives life with God at her core.

It is all something unknown. All out of my control. All promised wishes and prayers, for the little crazy girl that steals my heart and changes my priorities with each passing day.

Have a great weekend, friends!

Enjoyed this post?  Awe, thanks. I am blushing.  We can connect through facebook || twitter|| instagram || pinterest ||  bloglovin’

The Honest Company

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What all the Mommas are saying…

May 5, 2016

So, a few weeks ago, I shared This Post. It was my Mother’s Day Gift Guide edition. While, I adore every single item on that post, I got to thinking, what do I really want for Mother’s Day and what would my own Momma want for Mother’s Day?

For me, it really isn’t about gifts. Instead, it is all about appreciation and love. That is it! And, we honestly do not do that enough for those we love the most. It really is a treat to get a day devoted to you. Then I thought, I have an AMAZING circle of Mommy Friends. AMAZING. Why not ask them?

Can I let you in on a secret? These Mommy Friends, and their answer, wow! They are raw, hysterical, honest and heartfelt. So, incredibly heartfelt.

I asked each mother the same question – “What do you really want for Mothers Day?”


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“I want a day with just my husband and two babies, that he plans. I just want to be surprised, it doesn’t have to be fancy! A hike or homemade dinner. Just something that I don’t have to plan.”

– You hear that? Simple. Lovely. Appreciated. By, the way Mommy S. and I go way back. We don’t talk near as much as I would love to but she is handling a career and two little girls, one that is just a few months old, with such beauty, grace and ease. She does not realize how much I have always admired her and all her awesomeness.


“Hmmmm that’s tricky. So many options. 😝 I’d have to say a maid!”
Yes, Mother KP, I agree. I would add a cook for a day too! What a treat. Mother KP has become my virtual friend. We have never met but started a friendship through Instagram! See this is why I love blogging. I meet so many awesome, strong, women. It empowers me, when I meet women like Mother KP. She is a fabulous individual.VIEW STORY »

2 Comments CATEGORIES // Family TAGGED: Backwards In High Heels, Backwards N High Heels, Backwards N High Heels Lifestyle Blog, BackwardsNHighHeels, Being A Mom, Mom Advice, Mom Life, Mother's Day, Motherhood, Parenting

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