1 – We give love differently and we love each other differently.
Have you ever heard of the five love languages? Words of Affirmation, Touch, Time Together, Acts of Service and Gifts. When Nathan and I were engaged we attended a few weeks of marriage classes with our pastor as we prepared for the big day. Part of the prep work was learning and understanding love languages and exploring what our personal language was and our partner’s. It was the first time I realized that we loved different and needed each other’s love in different ways. Five years later, that has not changed. Understanding each other is different is not enough. Instead, I have learned that having an underlying appreciation for the fact that we are two different people and knowing what may make each other tick is actually part of marriage success. I gauge our situations by trying to say things such as, “I feel this way because…” instead of starting on a “You did this…” By taking the blame off of the other person and expressing the way you personally feel is super important in validating the fact that we know each other thinks and feels different; therefore, we love differently.
Marriage
Marriage. Who knew one little word could carry such incredible weight? It is quite hard to wrap my brain around the emotions that overcome us, the experiences we have shared and the decisions that are placed in our hands, each and every day through marriage.
When I married Nathan, four years ago today, I was a different Ashli. He will tell you that too, but he a different Nathan.
I remember that day oh too well and yet so much already feels a blur. The day was gorgeous with bright blue skies and big puffy white clouds and a subtle wind that lifted my veil. I was not nervous, which if you knew me then and even know me now, would find surprising. I am always nervous and anxious. Instead, I was incredibly calm. I was confident in Nathan and in our first real decision as a couple, which was to wed.